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Welcome to my blogworld...
This is Sexy Pinay...I am a woman who have walked through fire and travel her way through storms . I have my share of huge experiences in life, happy, sad, humiliating, depressing,joyful ,failure and winning moments...you name it... I felt it, I tasted it and I experienced it. This is my humble way of expressing myself. I'm a dreamer...a woman overflowing with passion and love... and most importantly I am a writer...Writing has been my passion, my easy getaway when the writer within me is craving to be unleashed. This site is like a home for me . It has been a gift to me because I met a lot of beautiful, warm and great people here.This site is very sacred to me... It is here where I go when I wanted to unleash the writer within me...I welcome you all to discover the beauty, the flaws, the good , the bad, the worst and the great things about me and my life... I want to thank all the wonderful people whom I met and love in this site. Thanks everyone and I welcome you all into my own little box that will give you a glimpse of who I am , who I was, and who I have become.
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Please Don't Ask Me...
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Posted:Feb 24, 2008 11:37 pm
Last Updated:Jul 19, 2011 5:58 am
8530 Views
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While I'm here at Affairlook blogging I have a headset now...I am listening to this song and I saw it at YouTube...I ove it...perfectly captured words...
Please don't ask me what am i thinking It's about you And please don't ask me I never can see you What can i do
My first impulse is to run to your side My heart's not free, and so I must hide Please don't ask me What I'm gonna say to you
I toss and turn Can't sleep at night It's worrying me, I go to bed Turn out the light But your face i see
It only hurts The more i pretend That we could ever Be more than friends
Please don't ask me Why I'm so in love with you You could easily make me happy That I know But I try my best to never tell you so
I will sing to you my love songs And pretend but I'll keep my distance right down To the end Please don't ask me why I'm not talking I just can't explain And please don't ask me
This song is simply captivating...when one is loss for words and afraid talk...love songs are here to help us...to capture what person feels..
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being free
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Posted:Jul 1, 2011 5:23 am
Last Updated:Jul 1, 2011 7:05 am
7286 Views
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There were thousand times that I thought of riding a bus and to go somewhere. To a different place...away from where I am now. To feel the cold air against my cheek...to breathe in fresh cold air...to release all the burdens in my chest , to unload the pains and to be away from society's measuring gaze. I wanted to play in the rain and be again. I want to run in a seashore shouting at the top my lungs...that I love to be free. I love to bring my back bag, my camera, my journal and to travel to a far away place where no one knows me . Why? I wanted to write a beautiful article or a story maybe. Anything that will give words to what's inside me now. I love to watch sunsets with my camera. To enjoy the serenity, peace and solitude of a quiet beach with a golden sunset. I want to get lost in a crowd and enjoy the freedom it brings. I want to ride my mountain bike and be in wilderness , and enjoy nature. Though I often do this now...biking to different places...I love to do it more...to places that I haven't gone yet. I love to do all these....one of these days...someday.... I am talking about being free To have your own individuality and be the person that you wanted to be.
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Sad Day
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Posted:Oct 16, 2010 5:38 am
Last Updated:Jun 27, 2011 7:32 am
7013 Views
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Today is a special day for me. This lost soul is in search for a home. This lost soul wanted to go home. This lost soul is in tremendous pain. Today is my birthday...I woke up this morning knowing that this day will be painful ..that this day will be sad....but still my heart dared to hope...dared to dream...dared to hope that it might be a liitle different.
I wonder if the angels from the heavens see my broken soul..i wonder if they see how difficult it is for me to celebrate it alone. When will this lost soul finally gets home?
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Unchained...
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Posted:Nov 26, 2009 8:53 am
Last Updated:Jul 21, 2011 5:03 am
7175 Views
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Its been about six months since I left blog land. Those were the days when I have to give up what I most love. Writing. Leaving blogland and being a silent and meek spectator here is not easy. It takes a great deal of effort to forget this site and move on. So for the last couple of months I was busy rebuilding my life back. I was so busy achieving my dreams and living my life in peace. Leaving blogland is painful. To give up something that I love is a great great pain. this site is always sacred to me. This site represents an enormous part of my soul and heart. So to give it up, to let go of it and to finally leave it has created a some kind of vacuum within me. Sometimes I still drop by to check some blogs of old friends but I don't stay long, I just pass by to quenched the longings of soul then I went away silently. But within those months of not being here it has created a some kind of liberation within me. Liberation that has made me whole again. I kept myself busy with my , my work. Those months that I have been away I found another site that I came to love. But Affairlook has special place in my heart , more than I can admit, my attachment to this site is one great constant in my life. Now I came back with so much hesitaton, fear and uncertainty...but I tried my best to go back...to fight the demons of my own making. To unchain my self, to freed myself. And now adays my life has changed dramatically since I went away.
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Soju's Day
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Posted:Jun 9, 2009 10:55 am
Last Updated:Nov 28, 2009 7:53 am
7013 Views
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Today is a special day for me...I consider it a sacred day...why? Because yesterday was the birthday of my friend. As a celebration...I went to church , to light a candle and made a wish...long and happy life of course and more courage... The classes here were suspended yesterday because of the outbreak of the h1n1 virus. So it's something like a 5-day vacation for schools...and that made me really really happy. So today, I started my day with so much work...I finished cleaning our place , do a lot of laundry and cook for the kiddos...then around afternoon, I called my bestfriend so we could watch a korean drama and have chitchat...and have our soju session...hmmmm...it's raining very hard ...I love rain..I love this kind of weather.
Around early evening we started our soju session..( drinking rice wine...a korean wine) in my small kitchen . I prepared some korean dish for her...hmmmm..nice life. There we sat for hours drinking soju and eating our beef barbeque, and spicy korean dish...Now I realized why Koreans love to drink this wine when they are sad or crying...it is so hot and the food so spicy that I could almost cry but atleast I could only feel the hot liquid slide down my throat, as if clearing away the tightness of my chest and the pain in my heart...
My bestfriend and I talked for hours...drinking..crying. If there is someone in the world whom I could trust with my heart's pain and sorrows...she is the one. She is very much like me...To her I was not afraid to open up...you see it takes a while for me trust and to open up...We also talked about her problems and pains...In our friendship we have nothing to hide from each other. We could accept each others worst side without any fear. I only cry to her just like this day...I was so grateful that I have her in my life.
Today is soju's day...because I am so sad...I remember a very good friend...Yvette listens attentively as I told her how much I missed the person...that no matter what that I will always hold on to my good friend. That the friendship and love that I have in my heart is unconditional...rain may fall from the great heavens, snow may fall endlessly from the edges of the earth, till my hair is gray...my friend will always remain in my heart..
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