It's On.....
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Posted:Jan 15, 2008 4:07 am
Last Updated:Jan 21, 2008 1:53 pm
3410 Views
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Well ya'll, I have started my transformation in to that bikini. I got up yesterday morning and took me a long "HOT" shower, and when I got out I decided to go ahead and take that before picture, and lawdy bees, when they say the camera adds 20lbs to ya, they was NOT whistling dixie there, but hey it's all good, just gives me more motivation.
You guys were great in the comments ya left me, and I won't let ya down  I'm so excited in more ways than the usual  I ate a semi-healthy lunch, and went for a 30 minute walk afterward, and get this I didn't pass out or collapse from lack of exercise  So I'm off to a good start.
So let's see how long I can continue this guru exercise thingy and eating habit  Will she make it? Sure she will, and boys when I do....look out cause I'm cumming for YOU!!! 
Have a good one and if one ain't good enough then have two 
 VV
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Write This Down.....
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Posted:Jan 12, 2008 2:57 pm
Last Updated:Jan 21, 2008 1:52 pm
3550 Views
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April 1st...Yeah I know it's April Fools Day, but remember that date as far as VV's concerned and here's why.....
I'm gonna be in a bikini  I know that sounds shocking, but I am, and I'm gonna have before and after pictures to prove it! But that's not all, oh yeah there is more, I'm gonna have new choppers to that's right a brand new set of pearly whites! Dayum folks I am from Arkansas and what few I have left are on their last root That's funny!
Anywho, here's the deal...Right now Today, I am a whooping 175lbs of curvy flesh, don't get me wrong I like my body, but I really like what's inside there, you know the size 8...hehehehe! That's right I wanna go from a size 14 to a size 8, is that to much maybe a 10 will do. I know Marilyn was a 14 and one of the most sought after women around, but you just remember she NEVER experienced an Orgasm I have an appointment the end of February to get my "NEW" teeth, out with the old in with the new  And don't think about no kinky Gum Blow Jobs cause these choppers with be permanent 
So Remember April 1st and let's just see who the Fool Is!!!  I'm sure it won't be me!
Have A Good One.... VV
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Have A Drink
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Posted:Jan 11, 2008 3:28 am
Last Updated:Jan 25, 2008 10:22 am
3472 Views
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Okay we are all adults here...I think Anywho, Let's get drunk and have a party  But be careful what the heck you are drinking according to this it says alot about ya, shit even more than I want it to
What Your Drink Says About You..........
Wine:
Red: (Women) I�m traditional, in a 2.4 , suburban sort of way. And if I�m not married already, I�m dreaming of the day I can pile my into the minivan after soccer practice. In other words, avoid me at all costs, unless you enjoy the sensation of boredom.
White: (Men) I�m pretty classy, but not a show-off. I might be some kind of undercover secret agent, trying not to draw attention to myself. Or I might just be waiting for my chance to slip the Rohypnol into your drink.
Beer:
Domestic: (Men) I�m low-maintenance, easy-going, and maybe a little uncouth. I enjoy watching sports, and don�t expect much out of life. That said, I�m probably having more fun than anybody else in here. (Women) I�m a lot of fun, unpretentious, and think I�m confident. That can�t last, so go ahead and treat me like a doormat.
Malt Liquor:
(Men) I plan on getting drunk as quickly and cheaply as possible. Perhaps I permanently lost my sense of taste fighting in Vietnam. Hopefully, I�ll have some money left over for my support payment. But don�t yourself. That money�s earmarked for more Colt 45. (Women) In about 10 minutes, I�ll be drunk enough to spread for you and your buddies, and I hope you don�t mind pubic lice.
Vodka:
Bloody Mary: I have a slightly exotic, possibly hippie air about me, and as an alcoholic, I need to find new and creative ways to work vegetables into my diet
Cosmopolitan: (Men) I�m gayer than Lance Bass in pink paisley underwear. (Women) I�m a former sorority girl, and sometimes, I watch Sex in the City reruns. In either case, better make a mental note of it, for later.
Screwdriver: I�m pretty new to the whole �drinking� thing but I heard about screwdrivers in a movie once. Since orange juice is part of my wholesome complete breakfast, I�m comfortable drinking this until science figures out a way to ferment bacon.
White Russian: I�m sophisticated enough to drink sweet cocktails, but not sophisticated enough to order anything too threatening. Additionally, I have a superhuman constitution that allows me to mix booze with milk without risk of puking until at least an hour from now, so enjoy my company while you can.
Red Bull & Vodka: Go ahead and laugh if you want, but I�ll still be dancing 6 hours from now when the clothes start flying, and you�ll be asleep, wishing the room would stop spinning. My erratic heartbeat is soon to be a cause for concern.
Tequila:
Straight: (Women) I�m looking for a party. Obnoxious dancing and/or girl-on-girl kissing are sure to follow. This tequila might fuck me up bad, but at least I�ll know I had a great night. (Men) I�m still coordinated enough to do the thing with the lemon and the salt, but I won�t be for long. If you want to take advantage of me, now�s your chance.
Prairie Fire/TNT: (Men) I�m trying to impress a girl, and probably failing miserably. I�ll regret it tomorrow, when the inner wall of my sphincter has a second-degree burn and farting causes me to black out in pain. (Women) I lost a bet. Maybe I can dump this foul drink out in that fichus plant and no one will notice.
Margarita: (Men) I�m just searching for my lost shaker of salt. (Women) I�m whimsical, have a great sense of adventure, and don�t mind trying new things. Don�t delve too deeply into my past, though. There�s a good chance I was on Girls Gone Wild.
Whiskey/Bourbon:
Straight: I�m a veteran cop who just saw my partner shot to death mere days before his retirement. You can leave the bottle, buddy.
On the Rocks: (Men) I am a tough cookie; men and women alike admire me. It�s entirely possible I wandered out of a movie from the 1950�s. In any case, I can probably kick your ass, so don�t fuck with me. (Women) Divorced at least twice, who don�t visit, liver spots, reek of cigarettes, and failure impossible to remove. Come and get me, boys!
Mint Julep: I am a feeble old man, and I may have thought this bar was the Kentucky Derby. What�s going on? Who stole my bifocals? Nurse! Nurse!
Rum:
Cuba Libre/Rum & Coke: I�m either a communist or I like drinks that aren�t too complicated, don�t cost much, and taste the same no matter where I order one. In other words, I�m a communist.
Daiquiri: (Women) I was on vacation once, and I like to pretend I still am. Also, check my driver�s license to make sure I am in fact old enough to drink. (Men) I must be a space robot sent to infiltrate you puny humans, because no man with any kind of awareness is going to order such an emasculating earth drink.
Mojito: My mother was once by a bartender. So, as a means of revenge, I like to order the most complicated, finicky, labor-intensive drink I can think of. That mint leaf better be chopped just right, and I want powdered sugar, not granulated. God help you if I see one granule, Paco.
Pi�a Colada: I like shitty music. And getting caught in the rain.
And a few other favs.....
Champagne: I am romantic, and don�t care much what anyone thinks of me. And if it�s not already totally obvious, I�m hoping to get laid tonight, and I likely will.
Fuzzy Navel: I like drinks that mask the taste if alcohol, and I�m willing to sacrifice my dignity in order to enjoy them. Please don�t take me seriously.
J�germeister: I�m in college, possibly high school, and I wish to impress my macho friends. I secretly hate J�germeister, but don�t tell anyone.
Well.....What's your Drink saying about you
Have a Great Weekend Folks VV
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Let's See........
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Posted:Jan 9, 2008 3:43 am
Last Updated:Jan 11, 2008 3:16 am
3126 Views
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Well it's "Hump Day" Do you know where your partner is Mine is tucked away under the right side of the bed...hehehehe! With new batteries mind ya Anywho, I'm all packed up and waiting for my apartment to be ready, which is taking for-everrrr, heck I'm about ready to go paint it myself 
Oh yeah and guess what ?????? I have a date for the weekend of the 19th  Not like that YET! I gotta scope this one out real good before I go having sexual relations and all, but then again, it's been so long since I had "actual" sexual relations this fellow may be in a lil trouble
Yeah this year is going great so far, knock on wood. *knock*knock*
Eat asked on his blog: What would be the perfect date, I'm gonna go answer that one and I sooooooo hope this is what my date is gonna be like 
Well folks nothing to funny floating around my way today, unless you count me pleasuring myself and the cats barging into the room at the exact moment I was about to go into Ecstasy Needless to say, fighting the cats off also kills your "off" time as well That's my daily pointer for today! Ya'll be good or good at it, heck why don't you do both
VV
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LMAO......This is some funny Crap!!
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Posted:Jan 8, 2008 4:09 am
Last Updated:May 1, 2008 4:58 am
3465 Views
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I was looking for some err well naughty stuff for my collection and came across these text msgs you can send to folks...I was laughing so hard I almost peeed my pants...I said almost
Here goes.....
1. 8 qualities of a PERFECT boyfriend... Brave,Intelligent, Gentle,Polite, Energetic, Non-alcoholic, Industrious, Self-organised. In short, B.I.G.P.E.N.I.S.
2. T-MOBILE regrets 2 inform u that the network has gone down on everyone except u.We regret 2 inform u that no one would go down on u.not even a network. (Ouch that hurts)
3. Today its cool to have small cars and small computers.Soon it will be cool to have a small penis too,then you my friend will be THE MAN!!
4. Luv is a sensation dat is caused by temptation.a boy puts his location in a girls destination.do u get my explanation or do u wanna demonstration? How corny is that
5. Sex is like a pack of Pringles! Once you pop you can't stop!!
And ya wanna know something....there are guys & gals that fall for these cheesy lines.  Oh shit I think I may be one of them!!!!
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Did Ya Know?
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Posted:Jan 7, 2008 3:37 am
Last Updated:Jan 8, 2008 11:20 am
3308 Views
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Well Folks here's some useless information for ya to think about this Monday Morning
Did you know?...there are actually two types of humans? The slightly larger and less intelligent kind, males, have protruding external genitalia called "penises" that are used for making important life decisions. Meanwhile, females have these nifty things called "vaginas" that no one understands yet, especially males!
Did you know?...Males, on average, think about sex every 7 seconds, with or without you involved in it
Did you know?...The Ramses brand condom is named after the great phaoroh Ramses II who fathered over 160 . Whewwww, now that's what I call product testing at it's best
Did you know?...Studies show that women who went to college are more likely to enjoy oral sex (giving and receiving) than high school dropouts. Gotta love the college experience
Did you know?...The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television were Fred and Wilma Flintstone. Gotta love those cartoons
Did you know?...Marilyn Monroe, the most celebrated sex icon of the 20th century, confessed to a friend that despite her three husbands and a parade of lovers, she had never had an orgasm. That poor poor woman 
Think about that crap all day and smile it makes you look more attractive (at least that's what they tell me )
Have a great day! VV
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"Strange" Sex Laws
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Posted:Jan 4, 2008 4:32 am
Last Updated:Jan 7, 2008 2:40 pm
3135 Views
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Well here I go reading up on crap again and came across some "strange" yet interesting laws
1. Harrisburg, Pa: It's against the law for lady toll collectors to engage in sexual acts with truck drivers in the booth....ok "who" was the lady that set this law into place
2. In California, adultery is punishable by $1000 fine and up to one year in jail, BUT in Arkansas the fine is a mere $20 to $100 dollars. HA...I bet ya'll thought we were just cheating on our spouses for the fun of it
3. In Indonesia the penalty for pleasuring oneself is Decapitation. OUCH for the men, but what the heck are they cutting off a woman
4. In Oxford, OH it is illegal for a woman to strip of her clothing in front of a man's PICTURE. Who the crap is making the laws in Ohio
5. The only acceptable sexual position in Washington DC is the missionary, any other is illegal. Well that was until Bill got into office
6. In Robach, VA it is illegal to engage in sex with the lights on. Dayum, do the people really "look" that bad and which law official is enforcing this law
Have you got some crazy ass laws around you? I just wonder how the heck the offenses actually become laws.....
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New Year
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Posted:Jan 3, 2008 3:56 am
Last Updated:Jan 6, 2008 5:57 am
3379 Views
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Numerous reports have proven over and over again that sex is healthy for you (yes, even if it’s with yourself). This week, the ever conservative FoxNews decided to step outside of their comfort zone a bit with an article titled “Sex Your Way to Better Health: A Dozen Reasons Why You Should Have Sex Tonight.” It was some of the best work they’ve done. This New Year’s, why not make a resolution that’s good for your health, and one that you might actually KEEP. Sex is good for:
Weight loss and control: 200 calories in 30 minutes of sex! um hello sign me up for a double session.
Pain management: what better way to cure your post-holiday blues.
Stress relief: by increasing your levels of oxytocin NATURALLY, so you can ween off that Paxil in no time.
Sleep enhancement. There’s no need to count sheep when sex, including masturbation, helps insomnia. Plus, making love sure beats tossing and turning your way to zzzz’s.
A better, younger looking you. Sex keeps you looking and feeling younger and, according to some research, may lead to shiny hair, a glowing complexion and bright eyes. This is because it increases the youth-promoting hormone DHEA (dehydroepiandrostone). And feeling more attractive charges your sex life even more.
Longevity. There is a significant relationship between frequency of orgasm and risk of death, especially with men. Men who orgasm two times a week have a 50 percent lower chance of mortality than those who climax one time per month. The bonus: Living longer also gives you and your honey the opportunity for even more lovin’!
So....break out the toys or find someone whos disease free and work on this New Years Resolution...Heck Fire this may be one I work on
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Interesting Stuff Here.....
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Posted:Dec 28, 2007 2:23 pm
Last Updated:Dec 31, 2007 10:47 am
3213 Views
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Well between the phone NOT ringing at work and the cats sleeping at home, I have had time to catch up on some reading between the packing sessions (man I gotta lot a shit)! Any who...I'm reading the MensHealth Mag and yeap this stuff is very Interesting For Instance: I didn't know you men WANTED us to jump your bones at any given time
And all the following are just SHOCKERS to me
THE 10 HOTTEST
SEX MYTHS
We consulted the smartest sex docs around to learn how popular sex myths stack up with reality
1. Uncircumcised men have better sex.
FALSE: Researchers studied men who underwent circumcision as adults. (All together now: Ouch!) They found that there was no significant difference in sex drive, erection, ejaculation, or overall satisfaction.
2. Some women can orgasm through nipple stimulation alone.
TRUE: Every woman is different, but one study shows that the upper portion of the breast, from 10 o'clock to 2 o'clock, is ultrasensitive enough to provide orgasm. Start there, working your way in toward the areola.
3. The average erection measures 8 inches.
FALSE: Relax, Shorty. In a recent study, 63 percent of men complained of having inferior hardware – but none of them was smaller than normal! Normal is between 5.5 and 6.2 inches long when erect and 4.7 to 5.1 inches around. Don't even think about measuring at your desk.
4. Oysters make you horny.
FALSE: You make you horny. "There is no scientific evidence that oysters increase libido," says Jon L. Pryor, M.D., a professor of urologic surgery at the University of Minnesota. "But there may be a placebo effect, so if it works, great!"
5. Green M&Ms make you horny.
FALSE: Unless they do. Then it's true. Isn't the mind wonderful?
6. Semen is low-carb.
FALSE: Semen is mostly fruit sugar (fructose) and enzymes – not low-carb. Which finally explains why there's no Oral Sex Diet.
7. Cutting out broccoli will make your semen taste better.
TRUE: Semen is naturally bitter, and eating broccoli and drinking coffee can make it worse. A ray of hope for the Oral Sex Diet!
8. Men think about sex every 7 seconds.
FALSE: That number is tossed around a lot, but the truth is that only 23 percent of men claim to fantasize frequently. But maybe the rest are just too distracted to check the clock.
9. Some women can orgasm just from working out.
TRUE: A lot of women require a buildup of tension in their legs to achieve orgasm, so when they combine this with exercise (like a hanging knee rais) and the release of endorphins and dopamine, it can cause the clitoral stimulation that is needed.
10. Having sex in water (swimming pool, hot tub, shower) will kill sperm.
TRUE: Some of your swimmers may die, but it isn't an effective method of birth control. Though a hot tub can overheat your testicles and kill sperm, there should be plenty left for the egg hunt.
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I Made It
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Posted:Dec 26, 2007 4:27 am
Last Updated:Dec 30, 2007 8:26 am
3835 Views
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Well I managed to make thru the worst Christmas I think I have ever had...Oh let me tell ya what the hell happen to me and you see if it's that bad.......
First off Saturday nite "we" went to "his" Christmas party at this fancy place and I show up in jeans a sweater and boots, well that right there let me know it was gonna be a bad situation. One of his so called bosses brought their 19 yr old with them and this lil bitch was all over him and wanting him to go down to the Pier with her and oh here's the good part I was left standing by myself, didn't know anybody, and he runs off with her to get her a drink and make sure she was having a good time. Yeah...well the party went on for about 2 hours and finally someone came and talked to me, which was kinda nice, then we leave and where do we go, yeap to his so called bosses house with the . 
After about 30 minutes of her sitting in his lap and laughing at me, I just got up and left. It's about 10:30 and we are about 35 miles from home and I have no phone. I start walking, now remember I have on boots "ouch"! I make it about 20 miles and this nice guy stops and says do you need a ride, I said look I just wanna go home and my feet hurt, I have money & jewelry just don't kill me. The guy sneakers and says get in lady I don't want your stuff, I just wanna get you off this damn Interstate. He took me home and was a real Gentleman the entire way there, If I knew what his name was and how to contact him I'd give him a great big hug and say THANK YOU! Well about 1 am the man rolls in and starts cussing me like a dog, cause I left, well I thought he was gonna stay there and enjoy his new young piece of ass, so instead of me making a scene I left and let him do whatever he wanted, which musta been what he wanted cause it was 2 hours later before he came home huh?
So, I have these great big blisters on my feet and he packs some clothes and leaves to go home to his momma, while I'm left home alone with no way to go and no family or friends within 200 miles of me.
BUT, all is not lost people, I have come to the realization that I'm better than this and I don't deserve to be treated like this either. I'm packing up and looking for an apartment, so hopefully I'll be good to go in about a month and can get on my own two feet.
Soooooo...How was ya'll Christmas
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To link to this blog (rm_ItsMeVV) use [blog rm_ItsMeVV] in your messages.
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