Thought of the Day
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Posted:Dec 26, 2022 6:23 pm
Last Updated:Dec 27, 2022 5:10 pm
1812 Views
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If you forgive a person, but you hang on to the anger, the pain and the hurt and you say you forgave the person, then you don't understand what forgiveness really is. Forgiveness is not for the other person, it's for you.
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Thought of the Day
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Posted:Dec 25, 2022 7:40 pm
Last Updated:Dec 26, 2022 6:20 pm
1064 Views
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I hope everyone enjoyed a Merry Christmas with all your families and loved ones.
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Thought of the Day
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Posted:Dec 24, 2022 7:08 pm
Last Updated:Dec 25, 2022 7:39 pm
1054 Views
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I doubt anyone thinks like this but I do
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Friendzone
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Posted:Dec 23, 2022 7:02 am
Last Updated:Dec 23, 2022 7:45 pm
1060 Views
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We all know what the "friendzone" is. My thoughts and view of the "friendzone" is this. I simply don't do it. A few have tried in the past and thought I would be ok with it, but they were shocked when I said, "No I'm not ok with it. I would choose to walk away and if you change your mind and want to try something again sometime hit me up."
That's my take on being put in the "friendzone". I choose to walk away and if they change their mind down the road then reach out. If they don't it's not a big deal and you keep moving on.
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Thought of the Day
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Posted:Dec 22, 2022 1:20 pm
Last Updated:Dec 23, 2022 6:57 am
2309 Views
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I see people posting these in their blogs daily so I'm gonna start giving a thought of the day. So enjoy the first one.
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My Friendship
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Posted:Dec 20, 2022 12:59 pm
Last Updated:Dec 22, 2022 1:19 am
1100 Views
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Isn't something I just hand out, it's something that is earned.
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Blackbear @ My Worst (Song is tight)
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Posted:Dec 18, 2022 8:08 am
Last Updated:Dec 19, 2022 11:22 pm
2689 Views
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Yeah
This is the end, this is the end, this is the end of me
Playin' pretend that I'm available emotionally
I'm off a Benz, goin' 'round bends, could be the death of me
I'm not ready, I'm not ready
Maybe I'm the best mistake you ever made
It sounds so fucking beautiful when you say my name
I'm praying to a God, a God I don't believe
The more I hide my scars, the easier I bleed
But maybe I'm the worst, the worst you ever had
Tell you you're beautiful, then stab you in the back
You're prayin' I'm the one, but maybe I'm a curse
The more you try to fix me, the more you make it worse
Could you love me at my worst?
Could you love me even though that, that it hurts?
Could you love me, could you love me?
Could you love me at my worst?
Yeah
Don't try to call, do not disturb, I do not want to speak
This is the end, demons are friends, angels are enemies
I'm just a fool stuck in the past, your worst memories
I'm not ready for you to forget me
I know that I'm the best mistake you ever made
It sounds so fucking beautiful when you say my name
I'm praying to a God, a God I don't believe
I showed you all my scars that I let nobody see
But maybe I'm the worst, the worst you ever had
Tell you you're beautiful, then stab you in the back
You're prayin' I'm the one, but maybe I'm a curse
The more you try to fix me, the more you make it worse
Could you love me at my worst?
Could you love me even though that, that it hurts?
Could you love me, could you love me?
Could you love me at my worst?
This is the end, this is the end, this is the end of me
This is the end, this is the end, this is the end of me
But maybe I'm the worst, the worst you ever had
Tell you you're beautiful, then stab you in the back
You're prayin' I'm the one, but maybe I'm a curse
The more you try to fix me, the more you make it worse
Could you love me at my worst?
Could you love me even though that, that it hurts?
Could you love me, could you love me?
Could you love me at my worst?
But maybe I'm the worst, the worst you ever had
Tell you you're beautiful, then stab you in the back
You're prayin' I'm the one, but maybe I'm a curse
The more you try to fix me, the more you make it worse
Could you love me at my worst?
This is the end, this is the end, this is the end of me
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The Pain & Pleasure Principle
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Posted:Dec 11, 2022 12:39 pm
Last Updated:Aug 21, 2023 1:39 am
4915 Views
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What is the pain & pleasure principle, also known as 'Leverage'? How can you apply the Pain & Pleasure Principle through powerful exercises like the Dickens technique and NAC technique of Tony Robbins?
What is the pain pleasure principle?
The pain-pleasure principle is an aid in setting and achieving goals, because it gives motivation. How you create motivation with this tool? It's simple to understand this principle: both pain and pleasure can serve as motivation to get moving.
Pain: When a gun is held to your head, you do as you are told. In that case necessity motivates you to get moving. The lever in this case is to move away from the pain.
Fun: When you can collect a million euros from the cigar farmer with a winning lottery ticket, change your clothes now and get on your bike. In that case, desire motivates you. The lever in this case is: move towards pleasure.
The Pain-Pleasure Principle means that someone can be motivated through pain and pleasure. Both can be used as motivational tools:
Pain or extreme need to change: "You have to reach your goal. If you are still stressed weekly in five years, most of your hair willl have fallen out and you will experience dangerous palpitation.
Pleasure and extreme limitless desire to change: If you look back on a life of relaxation and control in five years, you can enjoy a beautiful, healthy body and life for the rest of your life
Why does the pain-pleasure principle work
Why this works? Just ask a gazelle: How does he stay motivated when a lion is chasing him? In short: the pain-pleasure principle brings motivation and urgency, almost compelling us to change. NOW. Not next week or in six months.
There are four main reasons why leverage works:
You feel intense desire, motivation, urgency and/or intense pain that requires something to happen. That pain in particular gives you a hard kick-in-the-butt to so something.
Feeling is the domain of the subconscious, so it also sets it in the right direction.
You know why you do something ... if the way is big enough, you will always find a how.
There are many studies showing how powerful motivation becomes when we are at risk of losing something. So pain. When a boss promises employee A a Ferrari if he performs better, and gives employee B a Ferrari in advance and threatens to take it back if the performance does not improve, employee B works much more effectively than employee A.
Gentle healers make smelly wounds. With the leverage technique you will therefore actually intensify pleasant and painful feelings. In this technique you act with the conviction: you sometimes have to hurt people to prevent more pain.
By exploring the pain-pleasure principle, you can finally see the need for something. We often don't acknowledge that we have a problem until we investigate it and examine possible (painful) scenarios.
And not only necessity is powerful ... fun too! It becomes very easy to jump out of bed early in the morning when you have a 'sexy vision' of what you will be doing that day.
If you're working towards a great life with a nice partner, nice friends, lots of time for family, a comfortable home and a million dollars, you wake up much easier to go to work than if you were a not-so-so-so. - sexy vision of two thousand euros.
Using leverage is much more powerful than using discipline
You may already know that the subconscious is much more powerful than the conscious. You can consciously want to go in one direction, but the undercurrent of the subconscious can just pull you in the other direction.
Discipline must be used on a conscious level, while leverage has an effect on an unconscious level. An intense desire solves the whole discipline problem. Then you don't even need discipline anymore.
Make sure you feel so much passion and love for what you want to do that it's not even an option to do something else.
What are the steps to apply this principle: Neuro Associative Conditioning (NAC)
Step 1: Determine what new behavior you want and what is holding you back
For example: getting up earlier. What pain from changing and what pleasure from sleeping in is holding you back?
Step 2: Create a lever (thanks to the pain-pleasure principle) for your new behavior
Feel the intense pleasure of getting up earlier and sleeping in the pain of the rest of your life. You can also use submodalities for this, for example with a Mapping across.
Step 3: Action1! Now actually interrupt your limiting patterns
This is actually taking action. Now you are actually going to change the pattern by doing something else immediately when you feel the urge to sleep in. For example, as soon as I left like I wanted to sleep in: I put on crazy music and danced really loud as a pattern attack
Step 4: Immediately after that pattern break, do your new desired behavior
Immediately after step 3, do what you want to do: get up earlier. So for the next few days, get up early before your pattern break.
Step 5: Reinforce your new pattern add align it with your beliefs and personal values
Reward yourself after doing the same pattern. Immediately feel the pleasure of doing the new behavior. Feel the benefits of breaking your pattern. For example, reward yourself extra and make it even more fun to keep it up this new pattern.
Step 6: Reflect on your new behavior ... monitor yourself and your effectiveness
This step takes place, for example, a week later. Schedule a reflection moment to reflect on the actions you have taken int he past week or break your pattern.
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Quick Guide For Other Users
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Posted:Dec 2, 2022 6:05 pm
Last Updated:Dec 11, 2022 11:18 am
3512 Views
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I think I've mentioned this before, but if I didn't I'll mention it now. Since this site has had facelift and many features have been updated including members profile pages, they seemed to have left a few things off and one of those things was if someone had their own chat room there was always a "chat" icon on the page for other members to access the room. I'm able to see the icon on my page, but I don't think other members are able to so there is only one backdoor way that I know of that still works and I've had a few people ask me how do they get in so I'm going to write down the steps to take to find it. If you are using a laptop/computer it will be easier to follow and if you are on your phone you will have to switch from mobile version to full web version and then you follow the steps below.
Step 1: log into site.
Step 2: From your home page below on the left hand side of the screen click on where it says Friends (Found directly under My Favorites)
Step 3: From your friends page on the left hand side of the screen you should see My Friends Posts (Found under My Friend Network)
Step 4: This page should show you all of the blog posts by you or anyone on your friends list. Just click on the top blog post
Step 5: This page should be where you can read the blog that you clicked on and in the upper left hand corner you should see Blogs>The members name>My Blog (or whatever they have titled their blog), click on the name of their blog
Step 6: This page should that members blog home page where you see a list of the blogs they have written and posted and you should see a calendar on the right side. Above that calendar should be a set of options like (keywords / title view / refer to friend). If they have their own chat room and have enabled the option to post a link to it you will find it before those options. It will simply say "Chat". Click on it and it should take you right to their chat room. If they have made their chat room private you will need to know the password in order to enter.
Again, if you are on your phone you need to switch from mobile version to full web version and then you just follow the steps in order.
I'm usually in there when I'm online so anyone wanting to come and chat just follow these steps. I'm not usually on IM, although now that I'm a gold member for the next full year it won't cost me any points to send or receive IMs so I can certainly get on if that is easier.
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Getting Back To The Basics
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Posted:Jan 22, 2022 8:08 pm
Last Updated:Dec 2, 2022 5:58 pm
1151 Views
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I've started letting certain things get to me which has caused my attitude and behavior to change drastically. In doing so it has hindered and risked a special relationship with someone whom I care very deeply about. I've done everything from being rude to disrespectful to lashing out all out of frustration. It feels like I'm on the verge of losing it all when all I want is to be close again.
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To link to this blog (TheIC0N562) use [blog TheIC0N562] in your messages.
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