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It's happening AGAIN
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It's happening AGAIN Yes, it's definitely happening again, my has once again been called by his country to defend it. My is leaving for the 4th time in July for Iraq. He was supposed to just go for a training session in California's desert, instead, as he was leaving the house a couple of weeks ago, the phone rings, and instead he was put on 30 day alert. My brain froze again. I struggled to hear words and sounds but right at that moment, all I could see, hear and feel was NUMB. It took me a few seconds to shake out of the fog I had just gotten dumped in and for all things to register. I have to once more hug my , my , and send him into harms way. Had anyone ever asked me when he was born if this could happen, would happen, I would have said NO. Little did I know. I have had people ask me how long he has been in the military, my standard reply is "he was born wearing combat boots". Which it truly felt like and that he literally marched out with an entire brigade when he did, but this has been HIS choice from the beginning. I as his Mother can do no less than honor his choice, and turn gray while he is gone. Right out of High School, he went to a Federal Military Academy. He came out a commissioned officer. We were very proud then, I am prouder, grayer, NOW than then. I once told him standing in an airport, long before all the current events, it was peacetime, "where did the time go, yesterday I was changing your diaper, today I am hugging and kissing you goodbye to leave me for some unknown place on the other side of this world". Since that time, I have repeated that action so many times I have lost track, all except the last 3 times. Those times were burned indelibly into my brain. A while back I posted a blog entitled "I Kissed my goodbye today". It honestly signifies my 's life and how a Mother feels each time. My , his sister, will be my rock AGAIN, she will help me get thru the many long months of wondering and worrying. She will bring me sunshine, and laughter, and many reassuring hugs and kisses. She will help me pack boxes and make trips to the post office. She will cheerfully reassure me that her brother is invincible and will return whole as he left us. I am more than blessed with the God saw fit to bestow on me. Last time, I gave him a journal, and asked him to please, as time allowed, to write in it his daily efforts and thoughts. He did, and when he returned I sat and read every single word. This time, he will do so again, only I will also write one daily. Mine from the Mothers point of view, my thoughts, and fears and happiness daily. So, instead of a cheerful blog this time, I have just written down my thoughts at this minute on yet another deployment. I stupidly thought at the onset, that after the first time, it would get easier, silly me,for a Mom, it merely gets harder each time. Lady |
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Thanks a lot Josey, and Future Mrs. R. The closer it gets, the harder I try to NOT think about it. He gets on a bus in Little Rock on July 8th, and after that I have no clue when I will see him again. Lady
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6/26/2009 4:38 pm |
Nice post... From your heart...And from my heart....I only wish you the best of all things!!!!.....Sounds to me like your kid can take care of himself..Mom..!! Sooo let it be...it will work out!! Tony Sleep well!!
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Thank you Tony, I appreciate your kind words. Lady
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It really is wrong that they call them up so many times for such long tours. Be thinking of you Lady, hoping for all the best.
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