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Dreams
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Dreams I dream a lot, in color, with sound, feels like I'm awake dreams. I don't know what this means, if anything, other than that I have a vivid imagination. When I'm up, I have great fantastic dreams all warm and fuzzy and sweet. Lottery dreams, vacation dreams, happily ever after dreams. Dreams that have me waking up smiling and feeling completely at peace. When I'm feeling down I have horror movie dreams. Not vampires and mummies and zombies OH MY, but dreams that leave me waking up crying because I've lost those most dear to me. I also have suicidal dreams which terrify me because I have been there at that point before, yet I KNOW deep within my heart that I could and would never do that to my . But still the dreams come. I wish I could stop those, but I haven't a clue how to or if it's even possible to divert the subconscious in a way to avoid those kinds of thoughts and dreams. I try to think happy thoughts, I try to think positively. I try to believe that the future will be better than the past without completely forgetting the lessons of the past. I know that life is not full of all things happy, good and positive, that there are terrible things, hurtful moments, and shit happens. But I also know that there are moments that can take my breath away and just are what makes all the hard times worth it. Those good happy feelings are the ones I'm trying to focus on as I deal with some really hard stuff. I'm trying to re-wire my brain so to speak and train it to not be so hard on myself. Depression is not an attractive feature. Neither is self bashing. Or defeatism. I really can't wait until I can work in my garden again and be in the sun. I bought some miniature rose bushes and they're in my kitchen with the clippings of the coleus plants I snipped this fall. They're all ready to be planted in dirt as well, so soon I'll do that. It's almost time for a good Spring cleaning too! That always makes me feel better, scrubbing down walls (crayon art must go!) and moving furniture around (gawd knows what I'll find under there...) , throwing out stuff I don't want or need anymore. Purging. It's good.  I'm going to cook a turkey today too. Just the smell of a turkey cooking and the extra heat in the house always makes me feel good.  32 days until Spring!    |
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"I wish I could stop those, but I haven't a clue how to or if it's even possible to divert the subconscious in a way to avoid those kinds of thoughts and dreams." I know what worked for me--I stopped takin' LSD before bed.  Solar...
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I have friends who swear they dream in colour. They don't, of course. It's just a pigment of their imagination.  
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2/16/2011 3:44 pm |
If you know anything about a computer...there is the Hard Drive memory and a FAT sector which 'points' to all the bits and pieces of the stuff stored on your hard drive...When the FAT is destroyed, it becomes nearly impossible to recover information because it's scattered all over the place on your hard drive...(which is why disc compression helps with speed) Our minds work in a very similar fashion with respect to memory...When we are concious, we can group things together with dates and times and smells and on and on. Our FAT pointers are working properly. Sometimes we have a tendency to forget things. That's when our FAT pointers don't work properly and can't 'point' to where the information is stored...I could go into my theories on suppression, repression, memory enhancement activities, memory exercise, physical damage, and a plethora of others but only side snipits to this point. Dreams occur when there is a lack of concious control to the pointers of your memory. Your mind has an amazing ability to percieve things that you probably don't even know you've percieved. This accounts for some of the more foriegn dreams. The dreams are scattered bits and pieces of stored information coming together in a fashion that is sometimes haphazard or unusual...example: Judging from what you've disclosed...I'm pretty sure you've had a dream about someone who you knew very well in reality. In your dream you knew them just as well or maybe even better. But in your dream the person was a different Gender than in reality...for the duration of your dream, the gender switch was just as normal as things are in your life right now...But when you awoke, you recalled the person in your dream and cognative dissonance set in. Your confusion was probably not about the fact that you dreampt about a gender difference, but more likely about the fact that you were comfortable and accepted that switch as if it were reality (in your dream) You can learn to guide the contents of your dreams and you can have a cursory control over what you've dreamed about... Funny story...I was lying on a hospital cot and a very ugly nurse came up to my cot to administer first aide. I thought to myself, wait a minute, this is my dream and I want her to be beautiful and topless! As soon as I thought it, she was. I got so excited about what I was going to do next, I forced myself to sit up and in real life I sat up, which in turn, woke me from my most wonderful dream. I almost cried. I tried to force myself to go back to sleep to pick that dream up where it left off, but the emotional changes caused a different set of thought processes. I'm sorry. I'm rambling... If you're really interested in (this is just one theory) this line of thinking on dreams, I'd be more than happy to share. email me. He who has a why to live can bear almost any how. ~Friedrich Nietzsche
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"I wish I could stop those, but I haven't a clue how to or if it's even possible to divert the subconscious in a way to avoid those kinds of thoughts and dreams." I know what worked for me--I stopped takin' LSD before bed. Solar...  
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I have friends who swear they dream in colour. They don't, of course. It's just a pigment of their imagination.
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If you know anything about a computer...there is the Hard Drive memory and a FAT sector which 'points' to all the bits and pieces of the stuff stored on your hard drive...When the FAT is destroyed, it becomes nearly impossible to recover information because it's scattered all over the place on your hard drive...(which is why disc compression helps with speed) Our minds work in a very similar fashion with respect to memory...When we are concious, we can group things together with dates and times and smells and on and on. Our FAT pointers are working properly. Sometimes we have a tendency to forget things. That's when our FAT pointers don't work properly and can't 'point' to where the information is stored...I could go into my theories on suppression, repression, memory enhancement activities, memory exercise, physical damage, and a plethora of others but only side snipits to this point. Dreams occur when there is a lack of concious control to the pointers of your memory. Your mind has an amazing ability to percieve things that you probably don't even know you've percieved. This accounts for some of the more foriegn dreams. The dreams are scattered bits and pieces of stored information coming together in a fashion that is sometimes haphazard or unusual...example: Judging from what you've disclosed...I'm pretty sure you've had a dream about someone who you knew very well in reality. In your dream you knew them just as well or maybe even better. But in your dream the person was a different Gender than in reality...for the duration of your dream, the gender switch was just as normal as things are in your life right now...But when you awoke, you recalled the person in your dream and cognative dissonance set in. Your confusion was probably not about the fact that you dreampt about a gender difference, but more likely about the fact that you were comfortable and accepted that switch as if it were reality (in your dream) You can learn to guide the contents of your dreams and you can have a cursory control over what you've dreamed about... Funny story...I was lying on a hospital cot and a very ugly nurse came up to my cot to administer first aide. I thought to myself, wait a minute, this is my dream and I want her to be beautiful and topless! As soon as I thought it, she was. I got so excited about what I was going to do next, I forced myself to sit up and in real life I sat up, which in turn, woke me from my most wonderful dream. I almost cried. I tried to force myself to go back to sleep to pick that dream up where it left off, but the emotional changes caused a different set of thought processes. I'm sorry. I'm rambling... If you're really interested in (this is just one theory) this line of thinking on dreams, I'd be more than happy to share. email me.
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Ever dream that you were a cast member in The Brady Bunch or That 70's Show? I have.
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I agree! 
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