Reset Password
If you've forgotten your password, you can enter your email address below. An email will then be sent with a link to set up a new password.
Cancel
Reset Link Sent
If the email is registered with our site, you will receive an email with instructions to reset your password. Password reset link sent to:
Check your email and enter the confirmation code:
Don't see the email?
  • Resend Confirmation Link
  • Start Over
Close
If you have any questions, please contact Customer Service
Forgot password?
Blogs > todays_mystery > My Blog

Paradise  

todays_mystery 59F
99 posts
8/15/2009 4:43 pm
Paradise

I got this from a friend and thought I'd share....

Paradise

An 85 year old couple, having been married almost 60 years, had died in a car crash. They had been in good health the last ten years mainly due to her interest in health food and exercise.

When they reached the pearly gates, St. Peter took them to their mansion which was decked out with a beautiful kitchen and master bath suite and Jacuzzi.

As they "oohed and aahed" the old man asked St. Peter how much all this was going to cost.

"It's free," St. Peter replied, "this is Heaven."

Next they went out back to survey the championship golf course that the home backed up to. They would have golfing privileges everyday and each week the course changed to a new one representing the greatest golf courses on earth.

The old man asked, "What are the green fees?"

St. Peter's reply, "This is heaven, you play for free."

Next they went to the club house and saw the lavish buffet lunch with the cuisines of the world laid out.

"How much does it cost to eat?" asked the old man.

"Don't you understand yet? This is heaven, it's free!" St. Peter replied with some exasperation.

"Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol tables?" the old man asked timidly.

St. Peter lectured, "That's the best part. You can eat as much as you like of whatever you like and you never get fat and you never get sick. This is Heaven."

With that the old man went into a fit of anger, throwing down his hat and stomping on it, shrieking wildly.

St. Peter and the old man's wife both tried to calm him down, asking him what was wrong. The old man looked at his wife and said, "It's all your fault! It's all your fault!"

His wife said, "My fault? What are you talking about?"

He yelled, "If it weren't for your blasted bran muffins, I could have been here ten years ago!"

spiller18 38M

8/15/2009 6:55 pm

 Haha very good! It makes heaven sound so inviting.. Why are we all so scared of it?


queenie1961 62F

8/16/2009 10:33 am

 Very funny


capefearfun 47M

8/16/2009 10:44 am

 Hilarious!!


crikstof 54M

8/16/2009 11:32 am

 hot kiss from mexico city mmauhhhh


RayBSundley 72M
Ask me for a photo

8/16/2009 5:36 pm

 And here I thought Chattanooga was Heaven, especially when The Social Club held their meetings and we all just lapped each other up in free sex and lots of love!


kyfarmgirl43 61F
10 posts
8/17/2009 1:40 pm

 Hi girl;

As always, I love & enjoy reading
your blogs. You have the cutest
stories, that make us all smile.

Thanks for the smiles & laughter,
which the whole world needs more
of...

Your friend,

kyfarmgirl43


todays_mystery 59F
104 posts
8/29/2009 2:59 pm

 Thanks for the replies, I'm glad you enjoyed my blog.


Become a member to create a blog