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Celsius 233
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Celsius 233 "The world is full of complainers. But the fact is, nothing comes with a guarantee. I don't care if you're the Pope of Rome, President of the United States, or even Man of the Year--something can always go wrong. And go ahead, complain, tell your problems to your neighbor, ask for help--watch him fly. Now in Russia, they got it mapped out so that everyone pulls for everyone else-- that's the theory, anyway. But what I know about is Texas...And down here... you're on your own." - Loren Visser Tastes like dirt and tastes like cardboard are common expressions people like to use to express their displeasure with non-sugary not-fatty foods but how many people have actually tasted either one ? Some people have probably tasted dirt accidentally , taking a fall or whatnot - or having it forced in their mouth by a bully . Cardboard probably less so . They did an episode of Mythbusters about the adage that the cardboard box would be more nutritious than Frosted Flakes and other sugar bombs like that - spoiler alert food , even "bad" food is till more nutritious than non-food . Who knew ? Tastes like ass is an especially interesting one because it's generally reserved for the worst of the worst however I've tasted ass and it doesn't really taste like anything - much like pussy , and I assume dick . It's just skin . Sweaty skin is a little different but still . Arguably (as always , is anything no arguable ? What's the point of even saying that I wonder) the greatest Confucian shift of the past hundred or so years is the amassing and growth of humanity’s ability and need to narrativize our lives . We are getting awfully good at ignoring the fact that existence does not occur in three acts . We do not get happy endings , no matter how hard we try . It is a cold hard truth about life that , at the end of the day , everything is basically just a largely random mishmash of events , the severe majority of which are largely out of our control . As we consume more and more media , we become more and more enchanted by the easy fixes and strict fairness of fictional realities . We learned to love by way of romantic comedies , we know what a friend is because we know what Friends is . Our cultural lexicon has expanded from the simple mimicry of ideas from our surroundings both literal and artistic over the past few decades into the direct and diabolic yearning to live the lives we fictionalize for ourselves.  I learned along ago that you NEVER want to learn about the real life of a porn star because it is invariable depressing in one way or another - horribly so oft times . But helpful old Google likes to bring up bios for us anyway on the side of our search results and sometimes you can't help but catch a glimpse . And I found out the porn star I was conducted said search for is 21 years old ! It was almost enough to cause me to upchuck my Pan-Roasted Potatoes and Onion with Turmeric and Spanish Rice with Chicken and Sausage , but luckily I was able to keep it down . Hmm , or was that lucky ? I had already gotten the joy of eating , throwing up is unpleasant but maybe that would have been . I may be onto something here . . . Oh wait nevermind I guess people have been onto that idea for a long time and it's bad news . The point is I am almost 40 years old , I can't be whacking it to someone that young - that's just wrong , wrong I say ! I know she's of legal age technically but come on have you met a 21 year old ? I rest my case . I acknowledge that this may be one of those things where I am going against the grain because most people don't seem to care but it really freaks me out when I find out how young some of these hot women running around are . I remember one time I was driving around with an XGF and there was a track team running on the sidewalk and she made some comment about one of them being sexy and I flipped out on her . Her response was "people look the way they look , age doesn't come into it" so I stopped the car and Reverse Roundhouse Kicked her out to the curb because clearly she was a pedo . I dated a woman who was 9 years younger than me once and it freaked me out the whole time AND that relationship turned into a real shitshow , coincidence ? Probably . I'll have to stick to Phoenix Marie , Lisa Ann , Alura Jenson and Jada Fire from now on - I know they're safe . Plus they seem to have a lot more showmanship - they're moving around and saying stuff and giving orders and making a variety of noises , they're really trying to sell it . I mean make an effort young porn people ! Or course being the raging hypocrite that I am I have no problem with a 21 year old dude banging a 40 year old lady . Speaking of Supermilf is a term that's getting a lot of play on Twitter currently and I don't get it . I was expecting them to be Milfs with some kind of super powers but so far they seem indistinguishable from non-super milfs . Why call someone a Supermilf if they don't have laser beams emitting from their eyes or the ability to change into whatever material they're touching or can slow down time ? I mean seriously . Although perhaps they don't exhibit their superpowers during their work as porn people . You may be asking '40 if they had super powers why would they still be doing porn' and to that I say why wouldn't they ? Being a super hero doesn't pay anything - you have to keep your day job . It's a real drag . That's why so many supers are attracted to villainy . Speaking of young people , I realized today that while working with young people is annoying in several different levels (not the least of which being that it's a clear sign that I am underemployed) there is the silver lining that their moms are probably of the age where I could hook up with them . They're probably in their mid to late 40's , divorced and looking to get freaky . I wouldn't throw it anyone's face but it would be nice when some little prick who's 6 months out of college is acting like he knows shit about anything that I could think to myself "I totally banged your mom last night" and then I would feel better . And you know , if they were really being annoying I could always throw it in their face . "We can just write off the fees to the TPS account ." "No you absolutely cannot do that , just like your mom could not resist sucking my cock last night ." And finally , in Rick Potion #9 Jerry says "I wish this shotgun was my penis" to which Beth replies "If it was you could call me Ernest Hemingway" which made absolutely no sense to me until yesterday when I found out that Hemmingway killed himself with a shotgun in the mouth . Well played Rick & Morty , well played . Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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You know what's a weird toy ? The wind up chattering teeth . Who came up with that ? And why ? Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.
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Maybe you should be looking for a Porn for Seniors site. I bet that would be guys my age banging gals your age - age difference is the same just upgraded a generation. or maybe Vintage Porn ... that would be 21 year olds but from 30 years ago so now they're not really 21. Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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A friend once asked me, why is all your porn from the 70's? Because I LIKE 70's porn. You didn't have nearly the fake boobs and shaved pussies. Personally, when I look at shaved pussy I can't help thinking pedo material. Now if I'm on a MILF or GILF site I don't think pedo. I still prefer to see some hair. Sometimes you just have to beat around the bush. And my oldest is 35. I can't look at his girlfriends. For one thing he has very bad taste. Crosswords increase your vocabulary. Cross words increase your blood pressure.
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Once again superbj beats me to the punch. I was going to comment that maybe age differences get less creepy as we get older - like I don't find a 60 year old guy and 40 year old woman anywhere near as creepy as a 40 year old guy and 20 year old woman. But then that's probably the sweet spot of age differences - once it advances to being an 80 year old and a 60 year old it gets a little creepy again. Blood Simple, good movie - I had kind of forgotten about that one. Ah, those Coen brothers.   
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I tried to watch porn but it doesn't make me horny, just sad. You cannot conceive the many without the one.
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I think your point about narrating our lives is interesting. is it because we don't live them like people used to have to........ You cannot conceive the many without the one.
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