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How many mothers do you have to fuck before you're considered a mother fucker ?
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How many mothers do you have to fuck before you're considered a mother fucker ? I've fucked two that I know about , probably there were some others in there - I tend not to peer too deeply into the background of those who decide for whatever reason they're okay with me touching their nude bodies . Also I feel like a woman with adult shouldn't count . I mean they're a mother sure , but I don't feel like fucking them makes you a mother fucker . I think my threshold is 4 - once you fuck that 4th mother you're a mother fucker . I can't really articulate why , it just feels right . You ever hear a lady call another lady a mother fucker ? Its funny . Although I guess women can be mother fuckers too . But would you call what lesbians do fucking ?  I said "drunk wino" today and then I thought that was unnecessary but upon further review it seems legitimate . Winos aren't always drunk right ? If you assume that a wino is drunk you'll only be right most of the time . Did you know that August is the month with the most births ? I didn't . I guess that means November is the month the most people bone . Or at least the most people bone without taking prophylactic measures . Seems a bit odd . I can't see why December would be a big month for unplanned pregnancies , nor can I see why you'd choose that month to get pregnant . I always think of sexing as more of a warm weather activity . Although , I guess I'm displaying my prejudices again because in the Southern hemisphere November is warm weather right ? I wonder if more people live in the Northern or Southern hemisphere . Most of China and India are below the equator ? That would explain it I suppose . Whoa , I was way wrong , if the internet is to be believed 90% of the world's population lives in the northern hemisphere . Shame on me .  Someone asked me the other day where the names of the months came from and I said mostly they were named after Roman<b> gods </font></b>but the only ones I could remember were Janus = January , Mars = March , Venus = April (somehow) so I looked it up and they're not all named after<b> gods </font></b>, such as November and December are just named so because they were the 9th and 10th month . The Romans only had 10 months you see . The original name of August was Sextilis and I will be starting a campaign to change it back very soon . August is American Adventures Month so keep that in mind - if you feel like you're about to embark on an adventure wait until my birthday . Its an auspicious date for such undertakings . Its also National Panini Month - I fucking love paninis ! Astrology is real ! Its also Catfish month , Peach month and Sandwich month - I love all those things too ! Although it also contains world breastfeeding week , which is a mixed bag at best . I'm not one of those fanatics who doesn't think women should be allowed to breastfeed in public , but I am one of those reasonable people who finds it icky . You know , arousal is a funny old fellow . Such as the other day I was watching the adult film pornography - and I was WILD man I tell you what , those porn people were doing everything - I mean everything . And my penis was like "meh" . I got a little hard but I could tell it was just humoring me . If penises could talk , and they can't despite what Christina Aguilera would have you believe , it would have said something to the effect of "I know this a paysite so I'll get on board but its not really doing it for me" . So I moved on with my day and then later I was purchasing an item for a lady friend of mine , not even a sexytime item (for me anyway) and I got the BIGGEST HARDEST erection EVER and I "had" to jerk off . From buying a gift . Brains are weird , you never know what they're going to do do you ? And I know what you're thinking , I'm desensitized to porn and that is true to a degree but here's the weird thing about that , I think I'm desensitized specifically to hardcore porn . I say this because the other day I masturbated to an erotic story - can you imagine ? Just words ! No pictures of any kind , just words - who even knew that was possible ? Just my stupid imagination . And a few days before that I masturbated to softcore porn . I do that every few months to see if I still can , and usually its a struggle , but this time I was totally easy and fun ! Now granted the woman in the scene was a redhead and had some really spectacular boobs that were either real or very nicely crafted but you get my point - it was softcore . I liked this broad so much I engaged in some rare internet stalking and it turns out she's one of these softcore people who's trying to get legit work . I wonder how prevalent that is amongst softcore people . I find softcore porn highly interesting - not as a consumer of it but as a concept . I would like to know more about the people who get into that kind of work . Its so bizarre to me . Maybe it made sense back in ye olden times when hardcore porn was more "in the shadows" but these days its hard to even grasp why softcore porn is still a thing . Someone needs to make a documentary about it - a good one . Pretending to hump for a living - what a country ! In other news when I turned on the TV a bit ago I caught a few minutes of Family Feud and the "question" was name something that doesn't last . And the lady said "love" which his bad enough , but it was on the board ! It wasn't the top answer but it was up there . Heartbreaking . How am I suppose to scam rich old ladies out of their wealth if they don't believe in love ? With my superior wang ? I guess that could work . And finally , I've noticed several blog posts lately wherein the bloggesses were calling out dudes who say they're straight but they suck dick . Far be it from me to be the voice of tolerance , I hate tolerance more than anything , but what do you care ? Why is it important for you to label these dudes as bisexual ? Who cares ? And I know what you're thinking "Screw you 40 , you don't care about anything !" And that's a valid point , but if a dude wants to suck tons of dude dicks and says he's straight let him - what's the big deal ? All this sexual identity stuff is made-up bullshit anyway . Why does everything have to be codified ? Gay , straight , bi , "flexible" whatever man , its all cool . I say run wild and free on the plains of ambiguity . Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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Sooooo... shopping got you hard and you had to jack off. Did you wait til you got home? There's a soft porn idea waiting to happen. Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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Ha! Reminds me of one of my favorite A F F moments, fairly early on in my membership here I met a guy for drinks, we were chatting away about our sexual experiences and he got to talking about an MFM threesome he had experienced. "I'm straight as can be, but the next thing I knew, there I was sucking his dick". I laughed and laughed. The point is, it's sad that men's masculinity is so tied to being straight that they can't even admit to being 1%of the way toward being heteroflexible.   
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