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| Blogs > 40Deuce > Sherry Stringfield's ass in 93 |
Maybe I think YOUR cock is ugly CockARita229 !
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Maybe I think YOUR cock is ugly CockARita229 ! One of these days one of the fake screennames I use to protect the identities of the guilty in my blog is going to match a real screenname and that person is going to see my blog and think I'm yelling at them . I wonder what the odds of that are . I wonder what are the odds of that I mean . When I was a younger fellow this lady friend and I were in a bit of a pickle . We needed a place to stay and we had no money . So I said that I'd talk to the hotel dude and see if he's give us a room for the night for my watch and she said to me "Hard sell the watch but if doesn't go for it tell him I'll suck him off instead ." She was a real team player I tell you , except she wasn't because this - the dude didn't want the watch but he said he would give us a room if we did the maid service in the morning . Seemed like a good deal to me . My lady friend felt otherwise , she was pissed she was going to have to spend all morning making beds . At the time that seemed very odd to me but I was thinking about it today and I guess it makes sense - if you're a veteran cocksucker sucking a dude off for a hotel room when you're in a bind probably isn't a big deal , but waking up a the crack of dawn to clean ? That's a real hassle . And this lady did NOT like getting up early . Plus , think about it most of the time you're sucking a cock what are you getting for it ? A crazy handful of nothing . You know what I've been into lately pornwise ? That's a rhetorical device , it would be pretty disturbing if you did know . Seeing aging porn stars getting pounded by young dudes . I'm not sure what it is about it . Could just be the novelty , porn stars are usually put out to pasture as soon as there's any sagging of any kind . You know what freaks me out ? Really short skinny women with big tits . Why ? I'm glad you asked . So you're walking down the hallway and you see some big tits (that's what you notice first on a woman right ? RIGHT ?! ) and you say to yourself "Oooh yeeah" but then you see the general shape of the woman to which those tits are affixed and you're like "Oh shit is that a ?! Did I just oh yeah a ?! What the fuck ?! Am I sicko ?!" And then you get the full picture and you realize its a fully adult tiny lady and you calm down . But you're really freaked out for an instant . I suppose that's why models are supposed to be tall - that way dudes can be sure they're not being pervy when they pound off to pictures of them . I wonder if gay dudes pound off to pictures of models but they're aroused by the clothes . I wonder how homophobic it is that I wonder that . Maybe like a 7 . The tall model thing is funny because in the really real world tall women often complain that dudes don't want to bang them , which is ridiculous because it really doesn't matter too much what you look like , plenty of dudes want to bang you . I sometimes hear women complaining or see women blogging about how its a misconception that its easy for them to get laid and they are wrong . What they mean is its hard to get laid by a dude they want to get laid by - which is probably true . But you can get laid whenever you want - and I mean WHENEVER . There's probably a dude looking in the window perving on you right now . I'm pretty sure 100% of dudes have had this conversation with a lady . Lady - I can't get laid ! I am so horny , I want it so bad ! Dude - I'll have sex with you right now . Lady (laughing) - Gross ! See you later , wish me luck in getting laid ! I think the whole communication issue between the genders is wildly overplayed , but in this one instance its dead-on . When a dude said he wants to get laid that's what he means - he wants to get laid by whoever or whatever is willing . He don't give a damn . I'm not quite sure what a woman means when she wants to get laid but it ain't that honey bunny . I guess what I'm saying is that all men are horny pussy-monsters sticking their dicks in everything 24/7 and all women are frigid ice maidens with their legs glued together . Hey , remember that time I tried to make my own lube and accidentally glued CumBunny44's legs together ? Oh man ! Too bad that show Sex Sent Me to the ER wasn't around back then . Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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I just had a flashback to MySpace blogs...on the popular ones, if someone was first to comment, they'd go, "FIRST!" How dorky was that.  
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Now that I got that out of the way... You have a little bit of inconsistency in your stories here because on the one hand you're saying a lady would blow a random hotel clerk; and on the other, that we're so picky that "I need to get laid" really means "I need to get laid by Ryan Reynolds". But maybe the hotel guy looked like Ryan Reynolds, I don't know.
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You know you are right, but here is the thing, men get turn on easier than women, men can think about fucking and get hard, a women have to be turn on with foreplay, talking or whatever turns her on. So yes we maybe horny but if we aren't attracted to you or you don't turn us on, no fucking. It isn't miscommunication, most women don't want to hurt your feelings by telling him he isn't the one.
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"all women are frigid ice maidens with their legs glued together." Not all, my friend, not all. Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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I would have blown the guy rather than do the maid service thing and I've never sucked cock. It just seems like the cleaning would be a lot of work and a headjob is what 10 or 15 minutes? I wonder if that would make me gay or lazy?
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I made up the name CumSlutWhore to make a point in my blog. I later wondered if such a person existed on this site - and of course she did 
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I've heard that if you create a picture that is a composite of averages most people will consider that more attractive than a picture of a real person. We're too asymmetric and have too many eccentric features to be pretty. That might be why fantasy is better than reality. Unfortunately my fantasies are about asymmetric eccentrics. Crosswords increase your vocabulary. Cross words increase your blood pressure.
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