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| Blogs > rm_LilBlondeNZ > I Hope They Serve Wine In Hell |
Tiller, I think you've been scammed...
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Tiller, I think you've been scammed... I remember sitting in lecture as a 1L. The last class we had on Thursday was Legal Research. I hated this class because it went till 5pm, which cut into Happy Hour 4-7 at the bar across the street. Fuck I hated that class! It was so boring, all these stupid indexes and case digests, pocket parts, shepardizing and blue booking. FUCK it was boring! But it was a useful class. Useful because it taught me the basics of all governmental reporting. Including vital statistics. A lightbulb went off this morning while I was laying in bed ... (A rare, but usually very productive occurrence for this blonde) The State Department. The Archives. Here is a primer for all of those who don't really know alot about how the State Department works. The State Department is in charge of helping all nationals (citizens and permanent residents) overseas. In the case of the death of a national in a foreign country, the foreign country's hospital works with the US Consulate. If Brian were gravely ill, requiring the surgeries he spoke of in his call to Tiller, he would have been in a tertiary care facility with cardiac surgery capacity. All tertiary care facilities report immediately to the Consulate that they have a US national in their care. In fact, most hospitals will not even admit a foreigner without his passport information (and certainly wouldnt have kept him for weeks without a guaranty of payment). Even if Brian didn't have his passport on him at first, he would have been able to provide enough information for them to contact the US Consulate for assistance. They wouldn't have made arrangements for international long distance telephone use without knowing that information. You know why? Insurance money. No hospital is going to do surgeries on a foreign national without being promised recompense for their work. And any english speaking visiting patient (who was able to use the phone) would have been viewed with starry eyes by administration. In the event of a national's demise, the Department of State is the office that issues the death certificate. It is actually one of the department's most critical functions. Without it, life insurance and legal matters would be held up for months by inefficient local foreign governments. The State Department also usually issues these death certificates very quickly because they need to be issued in order to the deceased's remains to be transported for burial. The only certificates not filed by the Department of State are those of active military killed in combat; their certificates are filed by the Department of Defense. I found the information of the State Department's website (you can too under Travel dot State dot Gov, and then under Consular Affairs). The State Department is also linked with the National Archives, which has an independent research office. I contacted a researcher who specializes in genealogy and records of foreign deaths and I was informed that all reports were electronically filed with the Passport Office (regardless of whether the national actually was carrying a valid passport at the time). If the family had been notified, then the family would have had to go through the US Consulate so that the deceased remains could be transported. I was then given the number for the vital statistics branch of the Passport Office. I spoke to a very nice woman who was very accommodating. Since all Foreign Death Certificates are Federal records, they are made available to all American nationals under the Freedom of Information Act. I told the woman of the circumstances surrounding Brian's death and she did several searches for me. With not-so-surprising results... Not one country in Asia, nonetheless Southeast Asia, has reported a death of a foreign national in the past 7 days even remotely matching the age, description or the first or middle name "Brian", "Bryan", "Brien", or "Ryan". Not one. I figured that maybe it just hadn't been reported yet, but my contact was doubtful. The process of the final certificate can take up to 4 weeks in third world countries such as Sierra Leone and Nicaragua, or when the family has not claimed the body. However, if the family was involved there would have to be at least an electronic filing so that transport could be planned. I was informed that countries in Asia, are generally very quick about turning around death certificates. The average time is 2-3 days at most, the same as the average US hospital. With the exception of North Korea, the State Department has acceptable or even positive relations with most Asian countries because Asian countries demand on American tourists and American business for their large export market. The worst thing for a country is a US State Department Travel Warning; it literally kills the tourism economy there and American business involvement. Now I was trained to always look at the facts. The facts do not seem at this point to support the story that has been put forth. So before we all form a conga line of lemmings, posting and linking our thoughts and prayers for someone who doesnt appear to have died (if he ever existed at all)... I think that maybe we should just offer our silent prayers to someone who really needs it... Tillerbabe. Because either: 1. She's completely mental and made the whole thing up, Or much more likely 2. She was fooled by a person who either A ) Intentionally capitalized on her well-publicized emotional vulnerabilities for his personal satisfaction, or B ) Got into a situation he didn't know how to get out of and felt he needed to fake his death in order to end an unhealthy relationship. All of these above situations are really sad, and I'm very sorry to have to break the news of my research findings. My heart goes out to Tillerbabe, because this won't be an easy thing to recover from. I will offer this disclaimer however; I am not representing myself to have first hand knowledge of the situation; only a person who knew Brian, knew that Brian was the "Brian" that we knew, has seen him in person previously, and now has seen his remains with their own eyes at his funeral can honestly say they know the truth. So that rules out *everyone*, including me. I have only done as much investigating as an educated independent outsider can. Just as I was disappointed in seeing everyone jump on Dig Dug for his opinion, I would really hate to see people jump to the conclusion that Tiller made this story up, no matter how bad it looks. Also it's possible that somehow my research is flawed and that some evidence will come back that substantiates the story that Tiller was fed. I, however, have satisfied my own curiosity and have made up my mind as to what the situation really is. I encourage you to do the same. Also I will state for the record that I am *nauseated* with people who are exploiting this issue for comments under the guise of serving as the funeral guestbook. It's disgusting, and you know who you are. Anyone wishing to go through the same research steps should start at the Department of State Website and click through till you get to "Foreign Deaths of US Nationals", then follow the links for the reports, the National Archives and then "Hire an Independent Researcher". They are very helpful people in that office. I am always open to hear what anyone has to say, and would be very happy to post any additional factual information anyone can substantiate in this matter. I hope you see I have made an effort to approach this with a factual eye and remove the crazy amount of emotion that has been evident on other posts. I hope this puts some of the furor to rest. I will leave this post open for everyone's comments, but I will not be responding publicly. Have a good day, Blogville... and let's put this whole thing to rest. It's enough already. A |
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6/20/2006 8:30 am |
You know what's strange? It's strange that I wish you were wrong. It is strange when you wish that the bad news is the better news than the worse news. What a commentary on things, you know? Thanks for the post. I don't know what the truth is, but it does not matter. It exposes some interesting fault lines in the Blogville psyche, no? --Seriously
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6/20/2006 10:33 am |
A genuine thanks for your research, but....I really didn't need it. I'm pretty damn capable. I stated in kaleidescope's blog I have an older brother, his name is Corey -everyone knows him by that name...co-workers, when he was student..friends..family. We call him Corey. Except his legal name is Colin Corey (last name)..he's a "Jr."..named after my Dad and Grandfather "Colin". On all his legal docs...his first name is listed as Colin. Only close family and friends know that. Follow me? Gawd it was such a mistake to stay here and ask for prayers for Brian.
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"There's a sucker born every minute...and two to take 'em." ~ often credited to P.T.Barnum but in all actuality said by con-man Joseph ("Paper Collar" Joe) Bessimer There's another one to throw out also, fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. People around here need to start using their heads ... the one containing brains.  Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.
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6/20/2006 10:42 am |
Wow you are very thorough. As im not familiar with any of the 'saga' that has seemed to of manifested from tillers posting of her plight its not for me to pass comment really. I have offered condolences regarding this matter to her & to Brian's family. I have also commented on Digs blog of where i 'stand' which to all accounts probably appears to be on the fence. You have given much food for thought & many will probably thank you for this too. I am choosing not to be enveloped into any of it though as i dont have personal involvement with any of the people concerned. I want to really comment on your intelligence & clarity in writing more than anything. No dumb blonde sitting in your chair is there babes.
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6/20/2006 10:57 am |
blonde you are the woman I am so happy you did this this changes things alot and I have to go and say something to tiller cyalater roaming the cyber streets of blogland  
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6/20/2006 11:05 am |
well i must say that your post is the first i have seen that actually shows any real proof of anything about this hole thing. i have said from start when he "died" that it was probolly not true or that he is faking the whole thing. i was shocked to see all that bashed digdug for sharing his opinion. i must say you are very resourceful. and thanks to you, you may have just called there bluff. ~sexy~
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6/20/2006 11:08 am |
Well, good for you! Glad someone here had the brains to be able to figure this out. I know that I didn't! I said it once, I will say it again, I admire Digs for saying what he felt. Shame Shame on the ones that cussed him. One thing I never do unless I have all my ducks in a row and know the facts.
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6/20/2006 11:56 am |
Great reporting..thanks for preventing your facts..it is hard to know what is real without "physical" evidence..I have chatted and maintained friendships with both Diggy and Tills and have found them both to be kind, intelligent, compassionate and caring ppl But really..maybe Im not real either..who knows unless you have met me..
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6/20/2006 11:59 am |
Tiller called me at the start of this situation and did in fact contact the State Dept. She did not find Brian on any of the lists. I do not know if she tried again. Did check out the State Dept website you mentioned but the list I saw was for non-natural causes of death. There is a report of all deaths if the remains are being flown out of the country but I couldn't get to it. I stated my two cents - Tiller is not mental. I do feel awkward having read her recent post where she said they had planned to meet in July, go to Vegas in August, meet in Paris and Switzerland, and then again in Hawaii. And his last call came from a Restricted Number. If Brian is pulling a hoax, it is incredibly cruel. Regardless my heart goes out to Tiller and she needs to get closure. Tiller had said that he was in Hong Kong. I think she will talk to me. So if you could give me the link to the report you found, that would help immensely. You can email me at the Ysmiley face channel a Hoo with this sma ehandle name. Thanks
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6/20/2006 12:01 pm |
sma ehandle was supposed to read 'same handle' .. Michael_ig65 at Ya Ho dut com
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6/20/2006 1:59 pm |
Wow! Until I read digs blog, it hadn't even crossed my mind that it wouldn't have been true! But when I did read it there were some good points and now with this post, its hard to believe it could possibly be true! I just don't understand how people could fake a death, just to get sympathy from bloggers.
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OK, I was actually using the other method, searching for obituaries that mentioned the name of his company and drawing blanks. Or even finding a company by that name with offices in the rest of the world. However, before we all jump to conclusions, it's been a day, right? If it takes an average of two to three days for the reporting to get into the archives, we are jumping to conclusions before all the facts are in. Then again, he could have been another mentally ill type who made things up and when it came time that he was actually in danger of meeting a person, the only way out, in his mind, was to fake his own death. That way, you can get out of having to give break up speeches, or even come clean about who you really are. I have no emotions vested either way. I admit I rarely read either of their blogs. So I'm basically neutral. I feel bad for Tiller. Whether this guy really is dead, or just another mentally ill man playing on the emotions of a woman, her feelings are real. The pain she's feeling is real. If he is a hoaxer, that can only make it even more devastating and work to destroy any trust she has in men. I know they're not the same person. We have verification that others have spoken to him on the phone. There's that little trick I do with information on these pages to check where profiles were created. The profiles were created on other sides of the country. Hers, where she says she's from, his, Maryland. As hideous as this sounds, I do hope for the sake of all of those with a vested emotional interest that this guy is dead. I have a feeling there's going to be hell to pay if he isn't.
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Good post. I'm left with the same conlcusion as you. I, however, would take it one step further. If Tiller had never met Brian in person, why would she get so wrapped up in a relationship in the first place? That's my question. I think it all comes down to reality. Some people can distinguish between the internet and the real world and some can't. Sadly, it appears Tiller falls in to the latter. I think she had an online crush. DIV "My every move is a calculated step, to bring me closer to embrace an early death." -Tupac Shakur
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LilBlonde......I really just came here to wish you well with your upcoming trip and a huge change in your life! This post caused me to just ~sigh~ once again. This place called blogsland has meant so much to me in so many ways. I truly felt the support of many when I was facing surgery and cancer. So.....let me just wish you and your sweet guy the very best! You both deserve the happiness that you seem to have found! And I hope for the sake of both of you.....that there are no big secrets there that you don't already know. 
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6/20/2006 8:24 pm |
Dunno what the hell to say...we bring with us here, our private demons. Enough said. Thank you LIBlonde97 Woofff
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6/20/2006 8:51 pm |
As I stated in my own blog, I don't know what to think anymore. I'm just going to refrain from making any comments until the truth comes out. "Today may be the first day of the rest of your life, unless you live on the other side of the International Date Line, then yesterday was the first day of the rest of your life."- Larry Andersen
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Hmm, very interesting. Yet we are still no nearer to the truth, are we? I jumped here from the link you provided over at digdug's place as this brou-ha-ha has caught my fancy. Blog On!
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Death - terrible Fake death - terrible Fake relationship - terrible Fake people - terrible OMG - there's more drama on the blogs than on Coronation Street!
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6/20/2006 11:57 pm |
i want to see one person that can acutally say they have seen this man face to face. not over the phone or anything else FACE TO FACE as of yet i still have to see any one say they have meet this guy face to face ~sexy~
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I think you are one person with an opinion, just like everyone else. My point was about the fact that Tiller never met this person. Kind of strange that she'd have this type of connection with a man she'd never met, even once. That's why I'm skeptical. My intution tells me that Dig was right. She had an online crush with the guy and the relationship was not "all that". At least not on his part. DIV "My every move is a calculated step, to bring me closer to embrace an early death." -Tupac Shakur
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6/21/2006 3:43 am |
I think this is a well written post which does raise a few interesting points. Only Brian knew/knows the reality of this whole situation. Whatever happened it has hurt Tiller. There was a comment left by a male on the second post Dig wrote about this, who claims to have worked with Brian in 'real life' in Maryland and that from what he has heard Brian has died but not in SE Asia, which is maybe why your search is pulling blanks. Who knows if what is getting written is true or not. I believed him to be real, but on the flip side, I have never met him.
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I have followed this story line for the three weeks it's been developing (since May 2 , and I have to admit some amusement at the "tempest in a teapot" that has arisen in the wake of the man's passing.... Why amusement? I originally started blogging around the first of April, and one of the very first posts I read was [post 294867]. It put me off, just the idea that these people were playing with our minds over the idea of what was real, and what we (the people behind the handles really are) are really like. What I got out of this particular exchange of posts (since one references another) is that these people were fucking with our minds, so it doesn't surprise me at all, now that one (or both) of them are "leaving" that the subject of what is real has emerged once again. I have continued to monitor them "from a distance" ever since.Proving mostly that we can't really know who/what we're dealing with here, until we actually meet the person, and maybe not even then..... I know that I'm real, and pretty much as described, but we all have to reach our own conclusions about just about everyone else..... What is reality, after all, except what we make of it?
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Very informative post Blonde. Thanks
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I have learned a lot from this post. Thanks. DustStormDiva 
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WomenLooking4Fun: I have deleted your comment from this post. This is my house, and you are more than welcome to pull up a chair, sit at the kitchen table with the rest of us and let me know what you think. However, your comment consisting solely of a link to your blog telling me to take down my post was presumptuous and judgemental. I have left this forum open to everyone so that they can add whatever thoughts they want regardless of how I might feel about the content of their comments. However, your suggestion that I pull this post was disrespecful and I will not tolerate that. Especially after how I have gone to great lengths to address the topic fairly. Your comments are always welcome here, however your demands are not. A
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